Warning: the word cute is used more than OMG on those design shows

Newborns are a lot of things but squeezable is not one of them. Now that Baby Girl has gotten bigger she has become very squeezable. This new squeezability increases her cuddle-ability factor by 10. My adoration for Ella seems to grow right along with her. Every day, I find myself using the cute word more than I used like as a teenager. One of the things I appreciate about Drew is that he puts up with this. Even joins in, concurs that yes, her head tilt is new and it does show her shear genius ability. We must have talked about something else besides the cuteness of Miss. Ella, before her birth, but I really can not remember what it was. I am sure it was something very intelligent, like how to achieve world peace... But now it is all Ella. One day we will re-find ourselves outside of Ella, but right now I am way too busy trying to get her to say mamamamam or dadadada.

melting pot

This Thanksgiving Ella, Drew and I were surrounded by Family. Ella has met most of these folks but they were in spurts, here everyone was in one room or at least we were all in the same state. If Ella wanted to find a relative in the state of PA she would have to keep driving till she hit Dixie but in GA it is thick with kin folks. Some willing to make the trek to see her. As I look out over these folks I can not help but try and use them like a crystal ball to tell me about future Ella. Will she have MaMa's amazing cooking abilities, Memama's story telling, my Dad's creativity, Jeanerett stubborness....So far all we know is that she has some long toes. I have bets that she has my lips but I chalk up her face, eyes and hair to Drew's genes. I have been watching my friends children for signs of my friends. My nephew went through an age, where though he did not look exactly like my sister, he did have physical movements that brought me back to age 9 watching my sister play. It seems to me that no matter how close kids look to their parents, after a while the kids seem to own their features. They go from looking like their parents to their parents looking like them. They make all that crazy package of pieces given to them by lady luck via DNA their very own. I would like to go on record that her ability to look debonair in a hat....that is all Manning.

As you see my child play with an empty cheese bag, I would like to state that we have bought Ella toys. Adorable toys, toys that marketing has promised me that I need in order to keep her just as smart as all those other kids whose parents are buying them toys. However, Ella is immune to all that marketing and peer comparison and seems much more interested in a toys ability to fit into her mouth, making crinkly noises and be held in her tight little grasp. It reminds me of my nephews first Christmas, all those fancy toys and he seemed to love tearing the wrapping paper the best. It is one of the main reasons I always wrap kids presents in wrapping paper, even though I can tell you right now, I hate wrapping presents and love those present bags. I do not have the patience for wrapping presents. No patience for making those crisp corners and bows. I am too cheap to buy bows, so instead I try and make them out of wrapping paper and it just gets messy. Which brings me back to Ella and her cheese bag, the cheap part of me loves the fact that she can be entertained with a cheese bag. Ha marketers, my child is easily entertained by a cheese bag. It makes me want to try out other soft household items. For instance Fitz. I am also very impressed with her patience in trying out things like getting that cheese bag in her mouth. Patience. Patience in trying to figure out how exactly she is going to roll herself over to the toys she wants, how is she going get a hold of that dangle toy that is just out of her reach and how is she going to get those socks off. This is her fathers doing. His presents have the crispiest folded corners you have ever seen.

Plane Thankful

To squeak out a few more hours out of Thanksgiving, I stayed in GA a day longer than Drew. This meant I would be traveling alone with lovely Miss Ella Ann. Drew did this very thing himself not but a month before and he used the word challenging when he described it. Well, what he really said was more along the lines of " I am so sorry that you will be traveling alone with Baby Girl". You would have thought I would have taken that as a warning. I thought, well I will just make sure and prepare. I mean the flight is only two hours top, what is the worse that could happen in two hours? Actually, I was more concerned with getting through security then anything else. I thought juggling a baby, luggage and putting on and off my shoes would be the biggest issue. But at the Atlanta airport they have a line just for us baby toter's. There is a sign with a picture of a baby at the start of it and everything. More than 8 ounces of fluid, no problem, slow because you are juggling a baby, no problem. There is a sign, you are either in this line because you have one or you like babies. After security, I thought I was home free. Before getting on the plane, I made sure Ella had a clean diaper and one full bottle. I should have made sure that she had bio hazard tape surrounding her. My only hope was to get two folks sitting on either side of me that like babies, or at least do not mind the high shrieks that come from babies. As I sat down, the lady on the right of me informed me that she had 9 children and 15 grandchildren, I took this as a good sign. The lady on the left fell asleep immediately, I hoped she was deaf or had earplugs in. Ella proceeded to snack and then like a model baby, fell asleep. Just as I was getting out my list of things to ask a woman who has 9 kids, Ella wakes up and finishes her bottle. This is the one thing I had been worried about. Ella's only real demand in life is ready food source. About this time I realized that Ella's diaper was a quitter. Now, I have had Ella's poop escape her diapers before but I have never had a diaper just up and quit on me. Warm pee was just seeping on through and soaking my pants. As I was trying to wrap up Miss Ella in my coat to contain the leakage and figure out how to change a baby on an airplane, Ella starts vomiting everywhere. The lady on the right of me, got a good dose as well as me. Only a mother of 9 would have handled a strangers baby throwing up on them as blase. In the end I was holding a soaking wet, crying Ella, who looked like she had gotten in a fight with yogurt and lost. Ella soon went from unhappy to thrilled because she found out that she could tilt her head to the side and see the passengers between the seats. I had reverted back to the mantra that I use to say in all my math classes, this too will end, this too will end. As the plane landed the lady to left of me woke up and complimented me on how she never heard a peep out of Ella. It occurred to me that sleeping pills are way better than earplugs. So as well as being thankful for good food and family this Thanksgiving holiday, I am also thankful that of all the folks that sat next to me on the plane, one was a lady with 9 of her own and a water-repellent jacket and the other used more than turkey to put herself to sleep.

The other day Ella's socks were popping off her feet, her pants were more like shorts and her shirt was a having a hard time snapping shut. I checked to make sure she was not turning green with bulging biceps. It became clear that our lovely newborn has not morphed into the incredible hulk but instead is a full-fledged 15 pound baby. Tricky time. She even acts like a stereotypical baby. She puts her toes in her mouth ...check, she coos...check, she bounces up and down....check, pulls on hair, glasses and red beards, check,check, check. The child even has ham hocks. And strong, let me tell you, don't let that chubby cuteness fool you, she has a left hook that will knock the glasses clean off your face. Everything is met with a wide stare, once it has become familiar, Ella will give it a grin and try to pull it into her mouth. The world is a never-ending buffet when everything has the potential of entering your mouth. I knew babies drooled but this child is a never relenting waterfall of saliva. Thankfully, we have bibs, that if we change out every hour, we have a shot at keeping her in the same shirt for a full day. Nothing seems to please her as much as crinkly things that can fit in her mouth, whether that be the 20 dollar toy or the cheese bag. Fitz has also become worthy of her attention. After all he moves and if she is quick enough, she can grab onto his ear. Fitz just seems confused by this now, not so new attention. He is pleased to be getting attention, not so pleased at the product of the attention. He behaves in a stoic manner as his ear is being pulled to the ground and we try to unwrap her fingers. We are getting re-introduced to our child as she introduces herself to the world.

4 months on the 4th year

Ella turned 4 months on Drew and my 4 year wedding anniversary. Both seem unbelievable to me. 4 years? Really, I thought we went on our first date just last year, I could have sworn we got married just this summer. That was 4 years ago? What have I been doing? You mean we had a baby? But hasn't Ella been with us forever? There was a time before Ella, what in heavens name did we do?
Marriage to Drew has been a wonderful thing, nothing at all that I thought it would be. Well, almost nothing, there are a few things that turned out how I thought. The china we got for our wedding looks exactly how I thought it would when we eat off of it, as a married couple. But other than that, I have been surprised at how surprising marriage is. I can say the same thing for having a child. Before you have a baby, people you do not even know, will stop you and say, "congragulations, is this your first?" I would have thought that an odd question, but having friends and family that have had babies I knew what was implied.... What everyone said and what I find myself thinking now. You have no idea what it is like to have a baby until you have one. I had no idea. I read books, I asked questions, I read more books, but I had no idea. There has never been anything that has changed me and my life so ultimately, profoundly and quickly as having Ella. Ella is such a huge shift that there are now two parts to my life, B.E. (before Ella) and A.E. (after Ella) and I know that I was there for both of those times but it is hard to reconcile the priorities I use to have with the priorities that I have today. Nor can I explain how blessed I feel. If I could go back in time and tell the B.E. me anything, it would probably be what everyone said to me...you have no idea, however your wedding china still looks the same.

Welcoming Committee

Let me set the scene for you with this video. In the beginning of the video, I am chatting up Ms. Ella and then in walks her Dad... As you can see, her Poppy got a much better response from Ella than her poor ol Mom. I use to attribute this to Drew being the new kid in town, relatively speaking. I could not blame her, that child has known me in ways I hope to never know myself. Coming from a small town, I also can fully understand the excitement of someone new coming round. A new boy was mystery as well as a clean slate in a small town,where everyone know everyone's business. A new boy was someone who had never dated any of your friends, had never seen you eat dirt when your were three and in my case, not see your Dad pick up numerous dead animals on the side of the road. However, I have noticed that I will get the same response from Ella as long as I have been out of eyesight for a good hour or so. I can not tell you how lovely it is to walk in and have someone act as if you are just fabulous and isn't it wonderful that you stopped by. I have read that once you left a baby's eyesight, it as if you do not exist, so you showing up again, well that is just a pleasant surprise. I imagine this would equate to me walking into my kitchen and finding a homemade chocolate cake that MaMa had just baked, or reaching into my pants pocket and finding 100 bucks. If those inanimate objects could see, they would probably see me smile just as big as baby girl does in this video. Too bad for those inanimate objects, cause I tell you it makes you feel like, well, a 100 bucks.

New Stance

Ella Bella is standing tall. She prefers it to sitting or laying, you want to get a chuckle out of her, just stand her up. Your world view has to change if you go from looking at everything on your back to looking at it straight in the eye. Fitz the cat, goes from being 4 furry sticks to a furry body on 4 furry sticks. All of her sudden her feet have a bigger purpose than being stuck in her mouth. The whole game has changed. There is not just the ceiling and some dangling toys, oh no, now there is a whole room full of stuff to look at. Course, the guinea pigs still look the same. They are short, very very short.

Employee of the month

Here at the Zellner houshold, we have our very first employee of the month. Please note how well Fitz blends in with the couch cushions. Perfectly suited for his new permanent position of couch cushion impersonator and just in time for Halloween. Except for the snoring and the ears you would never know, there was a cat. Well, and of course there is the fur. And the constant meowing, and how Fitz throws up every now and then... But a great cushion impersonator. Great.

Sock Dance

I thought it was hard to keep Miss Ella's socks on before she could grab her own feet. Now I am thinking about duct taping them to her feet. Gray goes with everything and Ella would have custom made duct tape shoes, plus her socks would stay on. A win-win. Ella's socks and feet have always had a rocky relationship. Her socks and feet are like the boy and girl in one of those date movies, you just know they would be perfect for each other, if only they could realize it. As the weather is getting cooler, keeping socks on her feet has become a higher priority, just as being able to take socks off of her feet has become an Ella ability. I do agree with Ella and her feet, baby feet are sooo much cuter not in socks. And since Ella's toes are pretty agile, I sort of feel like I am covering up her other set of fingers. What if the reason we can not use our feet as well as our fingers, is because our parents have been blanketing them in socks, since we were just wee ones. I could be ruining my child's chance of playing the piano with her toes, or at the very least, buttering her bread with them. Who am I to stump a toe prodigy. Well, I will just have to talk to Drew about moving to a warmer climate. Somewhere, where feet can go unfettered and toes are able to reach their true potential. Poor socks, maybe I can use them to make some puppets.

Red-Eared Step Child

Dear Dr. Phil,
Please let me begin by saying I love your show. My family and I are in desperate need of your intervention. Recently, my family acquired a baby. I knew there would be an adjustment period but I believe things have begun to unravel and I now find this situation untenable. My family ignores me, gives my lap-space away to others-that-will-not-be-named and often forgets that I enjoy tuna. All of the discretionary income for the family is being funneled into brightly colored plastic objects that now liter the house. Never is money spent on say a paid cat-petter or a professional lap sitter. I am constantly being shushed because the "someone" is sleeping. There has also been a large reduction of available laps, since the baby does not posess one. I am not sure how much longer I can take this. I look forward to hearing from you.

Sincerely
FitzWilliam

Mouth Off

Miss. Ella has begun to stuff anything and everything in her mouth. She is like a lab pup, all of her toys are covered in slobber. I feel like I might be in for a little payback from karma. As a child, if I could some how get it into my mouth or lick it, I did. This went on way after it should have because I have a picture in my mind, of my frantic parents pulling my tongue off a metal post, saying something along the lines of "you are old enough to know better". Pre-parenthood, I smugly contributed my fantastic immune system to this old habit. I also have a memory of how most things taste, wood, metal, dirt, cat food, cat food in milk. If I could somehow pull out my taste memory at parties, I am sure it would impress. However, now, as I begin to monitor everything that gets near Ella, I regret my pre-parenthood smugness. Things right now are pretty easy. All I have to really watch out for is keeping Fitz in an un-lickable distance, but I know as soon as she starts moving it is going to be a new ball game. My only consolation is, if she does stuff everything in her mouth, maybe I will not have to spend large amounts of my time bribing her to eat her vegetables.

Bed bugs

Ella is rolling over and over and over. She can also hold her head up at a 45 degree angle and get up on her knees.What is going on, this child is growing like a weed. Jack's beanstalk has nothing on this girl. I find myself telling Ella, "milestones shilestones, you know that whole growing up and leaving home when your 18? That is just a suggested time frame, lots of people live in their parents house until they are say 40 or forever." But no, it seems she has a copy of the "How Babies Develop Book" and is reading ahead. Along with all this growing, she has started sleeping for longer stretches at night. Even sleeping through the night. I thought that when this time period came I would be like the princess in the "princess and the pea", once she finally got a bed without a pea in it. Relieved, so very relieved. Instead I find myself waking up at 4:30, tiptoeing into Ella's room and whispering "Hey Ella, Ella are you awake? Are you asleep? I mean it is cool if your asleep but if your awake, I am awake..." I miss the 4:30 wake up call. 4:30 is prime cuddle time. I use to count on that time to feed Ella and then tuck her under my arm and bring her back to bed with Drew and I. A small chunk of time not encroached upon by all of the days needed deeds. No laundry, or work, or daycare. Just me, Ella and Drew, with nothing to do but snooze. Well, that and talk to Ella about what type of wallpaper she is going to want for her room when she is 40.

Chillen' with the Peeps

Ms. Ella is able to turn over! We have not gotten to see it her in the act, but we know it is happening. She goes to bed on her back and when we come in later, there she is, flipped over onto her stomach. Drew and I have tried to get her to perform this little feat for us during the daylight hours, but so far, no cigar. The folks at her daycare tell us she does it all the time for them. All the time. Of course, for us, we have toys out and are cooing her name till we are hoarse but she just teases us by twisting her torso around like a little acrobat. I am going to get a hidden camera. Tape her at night. She has also started sucking her thumb, I have often wondered how that happens. Why is the thumb the finger that gets picked, by most every child on the planet? Ella has joined the masses and is sucking her thumb. Lovely, normal child. She still is working out the logistics of the whole thing. Most the time it is the whole fist that is wedged in her mouth, but the thumb is starting to win out. Not only is Ella flipping over and sucking her thumb but she has started to reach out and grab things. This is the moment I have been waiting for. All those adorable, noise making toys that hang, are now a reasonable purchase for me. Before, I had to pass by the cute elephant that sings a lullaby when you pull his tail, but no more. Now, I too can begin to purchase teethers that are rattles, that have lights and tell you a story and can be suspended by plastic rings. All those hanging toys call out to me, " I am just what Ella is going to want, I will make her day, buy me and she will be up and walking in no time". On second thought I am not sure I want her up and walking in no time. The child has been able to hit three milestones in two weeks (well technically thumb sucking is not a mile stone but if you saw the coordination it takes, you would count it as one too) if she grows up any faster I am going to have to pack her bags for college by December. Maybe she knows this about me. I am not ready for my little 10 week old to be rolling over quite yet. Perhaps, she is sparing me. Maybe, I will not put in that hidden camera. If she is rolling over in her room, there is know telling what else is going on. Reading, having disco parties with her peeps, doing complex algebra. I will just take what she gives me. Lawd knows, she fills me with wonder as it is.

The secret life of Mimi and Ella

My cat stayed with Mimi for a few weeks once. My cat who has never been feed from anything but his food bowl and who, having a vegetarian owner, had no idea what ham was. After staying with Mimi, I had 4 weeks of trying to convince Fitz that no food was going to accidentally fall from my plate and if it did, it would definitely not be ham. Though the meowing was incessant for those 4 weeks, I was glad that Fitz had had a little spoiling. A little bit of ham falling from the sky must seem like a miracle for a cat and who does not need a few miracles. That was my cat, imagine Mimi's granddaughter. This past week when Mimi came to visit, there were whispers of all the wonderful things that would happen at Mimi's house and it all ended with " we won't tell your Mama". I know I heard talk of a pony. I have been lucky enough to be spoiled by my Grandmame and I got to say, there is nothing sweeter than the forbidden fruit. With Grandmame, I had chocolates at mid-day and only had to hint at the toy I wanted and wha-la, it would show up in my room. With my parents, chocolates came at Halloween and I had to launch out an all-out- year-long campaign for a toy and hope that I would get it for Christmas. For the weeks I was with Grandmame, everything was special, including me. I was incredibly special. My drawings belonged in the Lueve, my stories were riveting and I was obviously a gifted ballerina. I knew, none of what happened at my grandparents, would happen anywhere else, but I loved knowing there was one place on earth, where I could do no wrong. I never told my Mama what happened at Grandmame's either.

Heads Up

Ms. Ella can hold her head up, I know, it is hard to get beyond the adorableness, but there it is, a non-bobbing head. We are at two months and one week and we have got head lift.

I can remember being way too small to reach the top drawer in my Mama's kitchen, the reason I can remember is because that is where my Mama kept all the spoons that I wanted to play with. And what I remember most is thinking, there is no way I am ever going to be tall enough to reach that drawer. I could believe in fairies and if I ate enough carrots I would be able to see in the dark, but I could not comprehend ever growing tall enough to reach those drawers. I find myself thinking the same thing with Ms. Ella. Here the girl is outgrowing her bassinet and holding her head up, but if you ask me if she is going to get much bigger I would say look at her paws, she is probably going to stay that size. It is not wishful thinking on my end. I love Baby Ella but can not wait to meet three year old Ella or 15 year old Ella, I just can not wrap my head around the idea that Baby Ella is going to turn into non-baby Ella. I have an easier time believing that a stork is going to come by and tell us it is time for us to switch out our baby for an older/bigger model. I have seen growing happen, with other babies turned kids and I got to say, always surprised. I always stand there and stare and say "my how you have grown" when what I am thinking is, you are a whole new child. Last time I saw you, you were this big and could do these things and it took me quite a while to figure out how to make you happy and now I have to introduce myself to you all over again, because you are a whole new child. How does this happen? Are children in a time warp? Ella has changed dramatically in TWO MONTHS, I have not changed at all. Well, except for my genius, super secret plan to keep all my Ella models.

One is never enough?

I am a glutton in all areas of my life. If I love it, I want more and more and more. I do not just want the whole chocolate cake, I want to trick the entire cake family over to my house and eat them whole, in one sitting. In keeping with my want of more, I want more Ella. I can not get enough, I am thinking of getting tattoos of her, on the inside of my eyelids. Of course, I then think, why stop at Ella, lets have more kids. Lets give those Duggers a run for their money. And then we babysat our friends 2 almost 3 girl. This is a sweet child, perfectly behaved and as about as charming as you can get. She asks how Mr. Fitz is doing when we see her at the grocery store, she shows me how dishes go in the dishwasher and is easily bribed by chocolate milk, I mean a good kid. I take notes on how her Mama trains her so that I too can have a good kid. But babysitting her introduced me to the reverse side of getting more. Chocolate cake, you don't have to fulfill it, it fulfills you, the rest of the time it just sits there, taunting you maybe, but that is it. Kids, sweet wonderful kids, do more than taunt. All of sudden there are two children that need to be feed and entertained and watched and put to bed and they do not go in the same direction at the same time. It reminded me of when I try and feed Ella, here we are, one boob is going and the other boob decides it too, wants to join in on the fun. I am trying to hold one boob in Ella's mouth, keep the other boob from causing a flood, suit Ella up in the appropriate rain gear and build a canoe, just in case I can not convince boob two, that now is not the time. All of this has lead me to the conclusion that more, will have to wait until Ella is 17. However, I am sure I will have to keep babysitting to remind myself of the above conclusion.

Face Fan

Nothing comes close to grabbing Ella's attention like a good face. Throw in an eyebrow wiggle and a big smile and Ella will give you an open mouth gurgle. That is as good as a standing ovation in the newborn circuit. Faces beat out rattles, lights and black and white contrasty items. A herd of zebras can not compare to a face. I do not want to brag, but my face routine, can beat out Ella's mobile. A mobile that has flapping leaves, music and 4 swinging stuffed animals, one if which is a monkey. The only nemesis to my face's ability to keep her attention....the fan. There I am, in the middle of the 2nd act of my face routine, eyebrow wiggle, eyebrow wiggle, open smile, when I start to see her eyes slide towards the fan. I begin amping it up, like a desperate actress past her prime, trying to keep the casting agents attention. No go, Ella is in the fans hypnotic swirl. No matter how fast my eyebrows go or how wide my smile is, Ella is in the fans clutches. That fan might be winning the battle but it is not going to win the war. I am going to start pulling out ear wiggling as soon as I can figure out how to move that muscle. That's right, as in much of my life, it ain't smarts that got me to the finish line but tenacity. My ears and I are working overtime, it is only a matter of time before she is mine all mine.

This means "Hungry"

Can I say this without tempting the fates? Ella is an easy going baby. This past week was a true test. I carted this adorable babe around like Paris Hilton carts around her chihuahua. We went to a music festival, not once but twice, we made a couple of hour long car trips, a few restaurant stops and Ella was held by no fewer than 6 new people this week. During these expeditions, Ella was exposed to all types of sights and sounds including a man who impersonated Donald Duck while wearing a shirt that said "AA a great place to meet drunk broads". During this time, when Ella cried, 9 times out of 10 it meant "hungry". Well, I really should type "HUNGRY".
Poor Ella, I had read prior to conceiving, that Moms can pick out their babies cries amongst the cries of a truck-load of infants. I strained to pick Ella's cries out of the other infants in the hospital nursery. Nothing, I thought, I will give it some time. To this day, I mistake my tone-deaf cat's meows for Ella's cries. I come running into the room, only to see Ella happy as punch and my cat sitting by the door to be let out. I have friends and family with children, who were once babies. They have told me the multiple step rituals they had for calming their babies down. Most of these rituals seem to involve being able to swaddle, rock, shush and feed the babies all at the same time. It also seems that each baby has their own specific element that has to be added in, such as playing with a scrunchy that looks like hair or being held in direct sunlight. During these conversations I keep quiet, something tells me it is not a good idea to say "yeah to make Ella stop crying I have to feed her". Perhaps that is why I can not tell Ella's cry from my cats Meow, I have yet to try and study it for the secret recipe to make it stop. There is no way Drew and I are going to get out of babyhoodom this easy. I am stocking up on scrunchies that look like hair.

You'd smile too if someone talked to you like a minature poodle on helium

Soon after Ella's birth, our house was filled with high-pitched terms of endearment. Drew picked up Parentese faster than Noshawn moves a football down the field. Never has a baby girl been so delighted with a bearded man speaking in a falsetto voice, as Ella is with her Daddy. I however, tended to go from high pitched helium to a Mr. T impersonation. Parentese, is the language that all people speak to babies in. I mean all people, across the globe, see a baby and speak an octave higher and draw out their vowels like they are from south Georgia. Preschoolers do it with younger siblings and here I am speaking like a large man with a mohawk. I pity the Ella. Lucky for me Ella did some coaching. Smiley face when I spoke high-pitched, worried-about-how-many-of-her-Mama's-genes-she-got face when I spoke Mr. T. Since I would eat beets covered in licorice and black pepper, something I would not do if it gave me magical powers and a photographic memory, to see Ella smile, my training moved along pretty quickly. Now if she could only teach me how to beat Drew at checkers.

Ummm, I can not find the lap on this one

Ella coming has not helped relations with the pets on the home front. I have 4 pets. I say me, because, all of the pets came into our house without Drew's' full consent. This means that I am in charge of taking care of them. 4 pets and one child has gotten to be too much, so I have decided to downsize. I have three guinea pigs (Ford, Roger, and Betty) and one cat (Fitz). Fitz and I have discussed it and we have decided that Fitz will no longer be a pet. I am hiring Fitz as a temporary employee. Depending on how it works out, it might become permanent. Fitz is the house lap warmer and couch cushion impersonator. He has had a lot of experience at both of these positions. Since we live in the North, I think the lap warmer is the more useful of the two position (duct tape will be available to get rid of any unwanted hair on guests). My guinea pigs are another story. Ford has always been my favorite, being the smartest and lest likely to bite, of the three. I have decided to keep Ford as my pet. Ford has petitioned to keep Betty and Roger as her pets. Apparently food is not enough, she needs a little more entertainment. It is fine with me and she has been busy teaching Betty and Roger to paint her toenails. It seems the lack of opposable thumbs is the main stumbling block.

You can not leave me with her

Poor baby girl, every since she was conceived we have been hanging out together. All day, every day. I thought I would be the one with baby girls expression on her face. I mean how much of one person can you take? All I gotta say at this point is, give me more. That is right, I never thought I would say it, but there is no shaking me. I am an Ella fanatic. Not to say I do not like to get away, but even when I am away, enjoying onion rings, BAM, I start thinking about Ella. Crazy. I have not thought about anything this much, it beats out food and how to get Drew to agree to letting me keep the Guinea pigs. Gawd love her, because one day, I know she is going to try and go to school or prom and it is going to be so hard explaining why her Mom is looking in the school window.

A GA peach kisses a Yankee butterbean

When Ella blessed us with her company, her GA born and bred Grandparents came up to Yankeeville PA to visit the newest member of the family. Before Ella came, MiMi and Pop Pop had picked out their names and commenced to spoiling. Ms. Ella had 4 drawers full of cloths and an entire nursery of furniture, not to mention diapers, burp cloths and a very cute stuffed gorilla, thanks to MiMi and Pop Pop. After, she came, they got to spoil her in person. She was cuddled and cooed, kissed and rocked. Once they left, I was reminded of what I missed for Ella, family. People love a baby, but family loves Ms. Ella. I thought of this as I discussed how many poops Ella was making with my Grandmame. My Grandmame, who usually talks politics or geography, was intensely interested in how much Ella was pooping. Was she sleeping? How was the feedings going? Has she gained weight, when was her next doctors appt.. All this interest and the girl isn't able to hold her head up yet. I love that I have someone to talk poop with 'cause as much as folks at the supermarket will chat me up about Ella, I think poop talk might cross the line of polite conversation.

Put a birthday hat on her and call her a month old

Today Ms. Ella is officially 4 weeks old. A lifetime in newborn years, she is exhausted. According to the books, she has been learning to focus her eyes, figuring out she has hands and feet and learning to coo. I on the other hand, think she has learned long division, how to cook, read and sew and is excellent at cooing. She has not done any of the above things in real life, except coo, but I can tell by the glint of genius in her eyes, that as soon as she can hold her head up, Julia Child's legacy better watch out. I, on the other hand, have learned that though my boobs might not look all that smart, they are able to produce an on demand newborn buffet at the drop of a hat. I am so proud. I have also learned that Drew and I are now on Ella time, and continuous sleep is over rated. I have learned that Drew's patience, which I appreciated as his wife, who for the umpteenth time had to call him to find out my password for my email or my phone number, as his partner parent, appreciate in a whole new light when it comes to Ella. I have learned that nothing in my blessed life has prepared me for the joy of loving Ms. Ella. I would put a candle on the boob for you Ms. Ella, but nobody wants to see that. Instead I will say Happy one month day, we are grateful.

Every girl needs a party trick

Little Ms. Ella seems to have long, dexterous toes. These toes are always wiggling and can wrap around a finger like a bow on a Christmas present. Long toes run on both the maternal and paternal side of Ella's family tree. On my side, long limbs for my Mom's folks, are just part of the deal. They have long fingers, long toes, long legs, put some spots on those folks and they would be confused for short giraffes. On Drew's side of the family MeMama is the one gifted with long toes. Unlike my family, where long limbs are just par for the course, MeMama has put hers to work. She has been known to use those piggies to hold a knife and butter bread with it, during a party. I am hoping Ella has MeMama's toes. Every girl needs a party trick and that sure beats any party tricks I could have genetically passed on to her.

It is tough being the size of a watermelon

I thought, that I would love dressing up Ella in all her adorable outfits, call it naive, but I thought babies outfits are adorable, and babies are adorable thus, the two would naturally go together. Ella never got that message. She actually is O.K. with everything until we have to squeeze her head through the neck hole of any outfit. Now with some of these outfits, I completely understand, the neck holes are the size of lemon, her head is the size of a grapefruit. Throw all your major sensory organs and the ability to breath on that grapefruit and one can begin to understand why it is so unpleasant for the grapefruit. However, some of these neck holes can more than accommodate the size of her head. It does not matter. She is not happy. I have begun to think this is due to flashbacks. I have always heard that birth is like squeezing a watermelon through a hole the size of a lemon. Being the owner of the lemon, that is what I most sympathized with. Now seeing the watermelon, freak out anytime a hole the size of lemon comes near her head, I am sympathizing with the watermelon.

She sleeps with one eye open

Ms. Ella seems to notice a lot more now a days. All of a sudden she seems captivated by the window, lights, I even think she noticed Fitz. This has lead to her being more awake during the day. And even when she falls asleep, she seems to sleep with one eye open. It is as if she does not want to miss a thing. Being the last girl asleep at any slumber party, I can sympathize. This being said as soon as she hits her Dad's arms, all bets are off. She is snoozing like Santa on the off season. That Drew, very handy, one man baby changer and baby soother, now if he could only lactate.

Day Trip

Today Ella and I went to the park with our friends. Getting Ella ready for a car trip involves the following: pack diaper bag, feed Ella, change Ella, feed Ella again, oh my we have spit up now we have to change Ella .... and on it goes. Finally we hold our breath and stuff Ella in the car seat. If we can get Ella into a moving car, without any crying, we are golden. Ella will sleep the sleep of happy newborns, despite her poor bobbing head. All this to see some ducks, which of course Ella was too exhausted to wake up for. But then again, she is only three weeks old, seeing is a relative term.

The belly button has arrived

Ella lost her umbilical cord and now she not only has a belly button ( an innie) but she can also take real baths. Giving Miss Ella her bath is Drew's realm. He does it so well that Ella does not even seem freaked out that she just went from dry to wet. I on the other hand, try and set up all supplies: Towel, check, diaper, check, clean onesie, etc.. I can tell Ella is Drew's child. She is one laid back baby. Hold her and she is fine, lay her down in the bassinet, she is fine, tub time, fine by her. If any of that was me, I would want a plan written and submitted to me 24 hours before any change in environment happened. Thank goodness for Drew's genes.

The aftermath

Today Ella and I went to the grocery store. I have discovered that Ella is not real fond of groceries stores. Places Ella is fond of are anywhere she has instant access to the boob. The grocery store, even though equipped with the very soothing grocery cart, is not one of these places. Usually, I love people commenting on how adorable Ella is , but when I know that there is a ticking tummy ready to go off at any minute, I act like a bodyguard to a celebrity. I do a body block between complimenter and baby Ella, nod my head and usher Ella and cart down the isle. I also, usually enjoy a bagger who is conscious of not crushing my oreos. However, when Ella is crying and I am wondering how long it is going to take before my boobs start leaking, my priorities shift. I started throwing apples and oxyclean in the same bag, oreos be damned. Poor Ella breastfeed in the car like she was in a milk chugging contest for a radio station. She then, promptly threw it up. Once home, we changed, spent some quality time with the breasts and now she is fast asleep. I am munching on oreos.

Sleeping Babe

The bliss of a sleeping baby. It means that you too can go to sleep. Not since grad school have I appreciated a 4 hour nap as much as I do now. Knock on wood, Ella will sleep for 4 hour stretches. From all the books I have read, this make us very lucky. What amazes me is there are two of us, working for this little bitty thing and we are both exhausted. I can not imagine the life of a single Mom, much less the life of a single Mom with more that one babe. I send a little shout out to the heavenly father for all the single Moms, whenever I get overwhelmed.
Also, to all the Moms I have known. I had no idea, I apologize for handing you a onesies wrapped in pretty paper and then just going on my way. I should have baked you dinners, called and asked how you were on a daily basis, talked to you about your leaking boobs, or non-leaking boobs and promised you that things would settle down after a while (I do not know if that is true but that is the golden hope, that people keep telling me and I cling to it).