One of two

When I was pregnant it seemed like I was going through adolescence all over again. My body just went off on its own path, not even giving me a map telling me which way it was going, and me just stumbling behind trying to keep up. I no longer felt like one, I felt like what I was, two. After pregnancy I was still two because that poor Ella could not even lift her head up without my help, much less move around the house. She was my little puppet and I was constantly making sure she was O.K. and not too upset about being moved around like a sac of potatoes. But now, now I feel like I am back to one, just me. Part of this is because my hormones are finally starting to reach a more normal state. I am not longer crying hysterically because we do not have Christmas paper in October nor do I hate ever single human being on the planet (two of the side-affects of my pregnancy, lovely). But Ella Sue is now off and crawling, all over, up and down, side ways and sunny side up. Not only that, she has intentions, things she does and does not want to do, and ways to let us know. She is no longer a little being who we were trying to guess what was going on, now we know. She nuzzles us with her head and screams bloody murder when we cut her fingernails. She also seems to be an independent child. No need to entertain her thank you, she is just fine checking out the 204 ways she can move around the leaves in the back yard. As much as I loved being two, I adore being back to one and getting to watch Ella since she after all, is my number one.

And then comes baby

I have found in my life that photos are what is sometimes needed to convince me that something is honest-to-gawd happening. For instance it has been photos that have spurred most of my diets, not the number on the scale, but the photo of me with three chins, is what gets things moving. Drew and I were recently given the very large gift of a photo session by our friends. Looking at the photos from this photo session it appears that I am part of a family of three. In previous photos I thought, how nice, I am sitting next to my boyfriend who I happened to be married too.But in these new photos there is a Baby Ella, which brings in the title Mother, Father and Child. A real honest-to-gawd-family. Which pulls in even more definitions into my life, family meals, pincer grasp, college fund, life insurance, etc.. It brings weight to my new job title "Stay at Home" Mom. As with all the careers I have had, this is yet another one that came without instructions or a clear job description. However, to be honest, I never read instructions anyway, so it is just as well. This trait of mine leads to a chaotic if not creative lifestyle. Maybe if you were being realistic you would say messy. Since this is me talking I prefer creative. Not all folks can live with this type of mentality. I have imposed myself on many a poor family member that just was not of the messy genre. And though I tried my hardest to fit in, I have always stuck out like a sore thumb amongst the organized (read Drew). That of course does not keep me from trying. About once a month or once every 6 months, I pull out my to-do list, read "get organized" and start putting things in manila folders with titles on them like, "Test Scores" and "Receipts". Since I am not organized I know the pain that being un-organized can bring and am hoping that Ella has gotten some of those organized genes from above stated family members. Anyway, here I am an un-organized woman holding a child, that apparently I am responsible for since I am the "Mother" in this family of three. It is times like this that one has to hope that lots of people are praying for Ella Sue. I am also hoping that she is going to be good with map and directions...and teaching me how to beat Drew at checkers.